What is a witch? So am I!
HE: That’s cheap.
ME: You’re saying witches are cheap?
HE: I’m saying you’re not a witch.
ME: No? Are you sure? I’ll prove to you that I am a WITCH according to the dictionary:
– “a person, esp. a woman who professes or is supposed to practice magic, esp. black magic”
ME: See? It doesn’t take much to be a witch: I either profess or you suppose. I profess to be a witch.
HE: But I don’t suppose you practice magic. When would you have the time?
ME: Your supposing isn’t necessary for me to be a witch. The definition says OR not AND.
HE: But as the man, my supposing overrides your professing.
ME: As the witch I can do a black magic spell on you.
– “an ugly or malignant woman; hag”
ME: Who decides who’s an ugly woman?
HE: The man does.
ME: Men have supposed me ugly on IG. So. Second definition met.
HE: Even though you never met the people who supposed it.
ME: Witches don’t need to face their accusers.
– “one who uses a divining rod, dowser”
HE: Don’t you have a curling rod?
ME: I do. So, proven witch a third time.
– “one who exercises more than common power or attraction; a charming or bewitching person”
HE: You exercise more than common.
ME: And I have a charming personality. A proven witch for the fourth time.
– “one given to mischief, esp. of a woman or child”
HE: What kind of mischief are you up to with your curling rod?
ME: To find out, read my collected works. Mischief managed!
So, I’ve proven I’m a witch 5 times, that’s why for Halloween I dressed as myself.