If you turn to stone, blame it on the eyes

When I was a kid I loved this movie, ‘The Clash of the Titans’, the one from 1980s. I watched it again recently and I was like, wtf? Who’s this movie made for?

If you haven’t seen it, here’s, very briefly, the plot. Perseus, a beautiful airhead, definitely a 10, finds his purpose in life when he sneaks up in a virgin’s chamber while she’s asleep. His life’s purpose is to save her. To cut it short, she’s about to be fed to the Kraken in 30 days. So in 30 days Perseus has to find a way to kill the Kraken. That’s simple. All he needs is Medusa’s head. So Perseus kills Medusa and takes her head. But that’s ok, because Medusa is an ugly monster, who kills people.

No, Perseus, that’s not ok!! How is Medusa a monster?

1. She kills people?!! Well, let’s see… She lives as a recluse in this place and people keep breaking into her home trying to kill her. She’s perfectly within her rights to protect herself… She’s not the one who’s doing anything wrong here.

2. Medusa is a monster because she kills you/turns you to stone when you look at her. Actually, Medusa can look at your back all day long and you won’t turn to stone. You only turn to stone when YOU look at her. So it looks to me that if you die after breaking into her home, it’s pretty much your fault.

3. Well, Perseus avoids Medusa’s gaze and cuts off Medusa’s head because he needs it. But if you’re such a hero, Perseus, why don’t you explain the situation to Medusa? Hi there, Medusa, would you like to come with me and help me kill the Kraken? It’s about to eat a woman. I think it’s pretty likely that Medusa might have said, Ok, I’ll come with you to save a woman’s life.

And this is what ‘The Clash of the Titans’ looks like when I’m all grown-up. I hope Perseus got to grow up, too.

See you,

Misty